In the Spirit of Ubuntu: The truth of the matter.

Yesterday, October 11, was National Coming Out Day.  For those of us whom are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender, it is an opportunity to come out of the closet to family, friends, coworkers, or even on television.  Oprah has hosted an annual show for years, when people would come on to “come out” on national tv.  It is an opportunity to be truthful about who we really are, to ourselves and to others.  There are some people that view coming out as a statement to our sense of pride; I see it as different than that for myself.  For me, when I truly was able to come out as a lesbian, I was coming out and facing, and acknowledging to others, the real truth about who I am as a person.  It does not define in totality who I am, but acknowledges an integral, vital part in openness and forthrightness.  It has been a huge part of my struggle for identity and balance in my life. 

There are so many people that do not seek truth in their lives.  Sure, they may be honest with themselves and others about certain things.  I need to lose weight.  I  need to stop drinking.  That color really doesn’t look so great on you.  But similar to what I have written in the past about not being a kind person, I would say that I am not an honest person, as much as I am a person who is all about Truth, with a capital T.  Honesty is a value that I would hope that most of us possess; but truth is more intense than that, it is what we view in our souls, it is going to the deepest part of self and looking at it fully, and accepting whatever it shows to us.

However, many of us are afraid of Truth.  There is a fierceness that exists about not challenging our current reality; our current reality may be our reality, but indeed, not our Truth.  Truth comes from the deepest part of self, the part that many of us wait our whole lives to discover. 

This post was prompted by posts that have been done over the last couple of days by both CordieB and AngryAfrican on the topic of racism.  Any ism or phobia is perpetuated by our inability to face Truth.  We as a society cannot handle a Truth that we have helped to create.  Maybe those words don’t sit well with some of you who may read this.  Truth hurts sometimes.  But this is Truth, pure and simple.  Why is it so difficult for us to acknowledge within ourselves that racism, sexism, homophobia, ageism, and other discriminations still exist?  Why do we deny this Truth?  Because, if we look at it, it means we need to look at ourselves, and how we have created and perpetuated this Truth in our own lives………. by not speaking up to an offensive joke; by perpetuating a stereotype of a group of people; by not asking ourselves the questions of why we may feel the way that we do about a lesbian person, or an african american woman, or an asian man, or a hispanic family.  We don’t want to ask, because we don’t want to know.

We sell ourselves, and our fellow humans, short every time that we cater this fear within ourselves.  We need to go beyond that if the world is ever going to change.  We have to have the courage to look deeply within, to listen, and to acknowledge what we have always believed, and challenge that to get to Truth of what should be.  I may not enjoy the fact that I possess white priviledge, or that I sometimes still feel uncomfortable if I were to see a group of black youths walking down the street; or if I assume that the way that someone appears means that they are gay; but unless I face that Truth, the world will never change.  And our world is indeed, in need of those changes, wouldn’t you say?

Truth is not always easy; sometimes, it hurts as much as perpetuating the beliefs that we have always had.  But is ALWAYS, ALWAYS feels right.  When I came out, it is like I released the breath that I had been holding for years; only letting it out a bit at a time, and then holding it in again, for fear of rejection, including, rejecting myself. 

We all have the right to feel Truth in our souls; we can all walk confidently in the fact that who we are is TRULY who we are.  No hidden agendas or premises; just us.  As humans, we have no true sense of freedom until we live our lives in full Truth.  For in that full Truth, of self and others, is to release ourselves from all that binds us, all that holds us back, and leaves in its wake true freedom.  Peace. Bliss.  Oneness. Contentment.  Love. 

Ubuntu.