Okay, I am leaning over, looking into the pond of my life. I am seeking what it is I truly see in that reflection, in that face that is looking back at me.
I see beauty, at least some of the time.
I see honesty.
I see love, pure love.
I see child like soul.
I see an insecure being.
I see a person who is afraid at times.
I see a person who wonders if she will be truly cared for.
I see a fat person inside a slimmer body.
I see a forty seven year old woman who doesn’t look forty seven.
I see life.
I see hope.
I see a past, present, and future.
What about my core values of love, of truth?
I see both. I see love as pure as anything else, flying right out from my soul, and shining like moonbeams from my eyes. I see it as clear as if it was an actual image before me.
I see love in my smile, that has lines and sincerity and purity in it. It is lines that are there for love given and not received, received and not understood, and reciprocated.
I see truth; truth of what is to come, truth of what I only know, truth of my soul and all of its desires.
Being, and being here, right now.
I am looking deeper into myself than I have ever have before.
My dear readers, I am so grateful for all of you that come, read, some comment, some do it anonymously.
However, I must confess something.
Although I have written here on this blog about my beliefs regarding life, love, beauty, lessons, and experience, about living in the moment, I am but a human, and these are lessons that I am still having to learn.
Inside this secure exterior, is at times, a very insecure, child like person.
A person with a need to be loved, and not forgotten.
I am no guru, or expert. Heck, I am not even a life coach yet.
However, I WILL be. Bank on it.
I just want to tell you all that I am unique, and I do see my own beauty, love and truth at times.
And, I am also insecure, scared, and uncertain at times.
I have often defined myself by how I see myself reflected through others, through the waters within their souls, and how they show it back to me. That is in part, my truth, but it is also, a mirage.
And, I am still finding out who I truly am. Maybe, for the first REAL time in my life.
So far, so good.
Thank you, from my soul depth. For all of it.