I think I have always had a good sense about who I am. At least, I always thought that I did. However, I think that I have always had a good sense of who I am in relation to other people around me. Like, I have known my identity clearly as a mom, a daughter, a sister, a coworker or friend. A partner.
However, just as I have had to remember that I should and ought to have my dreams, and go after them, I realized that I also should go toward and give time to those things that I truly enjoy, just as ME. Not as mom or honey or sister. Just me.
However, that was a riddle of sorts; when I truly just stopped, to really think about who I am, and what I want and enjoy, it was a bit difficult. I wasn’t sure that I knew. I actually found myself thinking in my head,
“Who am I?” Weird, huh?
So, I just went back to basics, and decided that to help with encouraging this new sense of individual to emerge, that I would do an activity, once a week, that is purely for my own enjoyment. And, one activity that I have always known that I enjoy, is car rides. And travelling. To new destinations especially.
So, today I drove to Woodstock, New York, a place that I have never been to. I sang loudly and drank my coffee and smiled at the blue sky for the two and half hour car ride. Alone. I met three of my friends there, new friends within the last year, all through the Handel Group. We had a late morning breakfast at a local restaurant in a quaint little town that was so inviting. I shopped and smelled and took in all that the new place had to offer me. I hugged and loved my friends. I felt myself, I felt loved, I felt free.
This is one piece of my identity, one that I have known before, but understood a bit more deeply today:
Travel will always be part of who I am and what I do; I absolutely love it. And, I envision that I will be travelling to all parts of the world one day. Seeing everything I possibly can. LIVING life.
Friends, friends that really get me, that hear my words and applaud my efforts and love me for WHO I AM; that fills me up.
Music, driving, blue skies, and a smile. All essentials.
I am finding me.