I have had a promise in place for myself over the last few months to get to a yoga class in my community once a month. I have not done it yet, and yesterday, as I was still deep in thought over my recent life changes, I decided to go to a class I have been contemplating. It is a mile from my new home, and I got brave and decided to check it out.
I arrived a bit early, and just took in the atmosphere of the studio. It was cozy, warm and inviting. The couch was comfortable; it smelled of incense and there were many books around that were familiar to me. The instructor was welcoming and inquisitive about what I knew about yoga. I actually knew more than I realized, as my Intensati work incorporates a great deal of yoga.
She let me know that the moves would flow one from another, and I might be challenged. I found a comfortable spot on the floor, and got started with a small group. What was so amazing to me is that I knew many of the moves, and because I was familiar with focusing on my breath, and how to do the poses, I was able to just be present to the experience more. I felt myself opening up.
At one point, the instructor, who called herself a guide for us, was walking around the room, checking our poses. She approached me as I was doing one of the poses, and gently pulled back on my shoulders, to open up my heart more. I immediately felt my heart open as she nudged me back, and I started to cry. In that very moment, although I have made the connection before, I understood the power of being present to the body, and giving it the space to open up and release.
My intention during my whole practice last night was release, release of the tears and the emotional heartache that comes with loss. That comes with the end of love, the end of any type. To know that I can not only feel that, but connect with it within my body was so powerful, and now I know even better how to care for that part of myself.
I am really looking forward to going back and continuing my healing.