Monthly Archives: April 2012

Intention.

My life is amping up into some pretty powerful magic these days. In the last three months, I have been published in a professional book; I have expanded my coaching clients as a Coach in Training with the Handel Group, and I have created a fit body and good health for myself. I feel my dreams in my reach and I know that I have so much left to go after and to create.

One of the biggest ways that I have begun to really get the dreams that I desire is by being clear in my intentions. Setting forth clearly toward what it is that I want. Just as I have learned that in order to get what I want in life from others, I need to clearly ask for it, I have also learned that in order to reach the dream that I desire, I have to clearly set my intentions toward it.

Intentions are not just what we wish to see happen, but what we clearly are willing to take steps toward. For example, I know clearly that coaching others is my dream and where I want to go. So, in order to firm up my intention to that, I gave up other activities that took away from that, like teaching. I have enjoyed teaching, yet know that I don’t want to do that more than coaching. Coaching is it for me. So, that is where my intention is set.

I have set my intentions clearly when it comes to my body, my money, and most recently, my time. I envision what it is that I want, and create a plan to achieve it. Setting my intention.

Sure, I feel magic and spiritual forces guiding and assisting me as well. Yet, it is amazing to see the results of what I can do, simply by focusing my attention, and intention, on what I truly desire.

I can have whatever it is that will bring me joy. THAT is magical, indeed.

Asking for what I want.

I have not always been clear in asking for what I want. No wait; let me be straighter about that.

I have not asked for what I want in life, and then, blamed or resented others when I didn’t get it.

Messed up, right?

Yes, I have discovered how human I actually am, and the truth is, I haven’t viewed myself as human, nor as finding it necessary to tell others what I want, or ask them for it, rather than expect them to read my mind.

It is funny how I played at this too. I would set them up basically, to not know what I wanted, and then I could feel so disappointed that they didn’t know, based on how well they knew me. Based on how much they said they loved me. It was a no win situation for them, and for me, every time.

I remember distinctly that my former partner would always ask me for a birthday or Christmas list of things that I wanted. I would pretend that I didn’t give it to her, because I didn’t want to ask for my own presents. While that was part of it, the bigger truth about it was that I wanted her to instinctively know what would make me the most happy; to have paid close enough attention to my needs to be able to choose the perfect gift.

Bitchy, right?

So, now where I need to be, and to stand in my life, is to directly and lovingly ask clearly for what I want. That is important for me to keep in mind as I go forward into my coaching career; as I get ready to write and publish books, as I continue to coparent our daughter, and as I enter the dating world in the (near) future.

I cannot stand powerfully in my own life, and play dumb or helpless at the same time.

I am powerful. I am magical. I am free and loving and ready for my life.

And I am ready to ask for it.

Time.

Time. It waits for no one. It marches on. It flies by. It escapes us.

Or so we think.

I am learning so much about what I have always believed about my time, and how I spend it, and how to design more brilliant relationship with it.

For most of my adult life, I have been a time lamentor; meaning, I often lament about the lack of time that I have. So many things to do, and too little time to do it in. For most of my last thirty or so years, I have made my lack of time, time’s fault. Damn the hours of a day; not to have enough! Why does this take so much time? Why is it already midnight?

SO silly and shortsighted of me. I am the orchestrator of my time, after all.

For all of those years, I was the one spending every minute of my time precisely as I set it up to do so. Therefore, any wasting of it, lack of it, or need for more of it was my making. Now, it is only recently, meaning, in the last year or so, that I have been even slightly willing to consider this as the true story. I was unhappy with not having enough time all of these years, but happy to be able to blame it on the time itself, and not look to how I could manage it much differently.

So, I am on a mission to take down my time lamentor. I am going to discover my past ideas of what I thought time should be to suit me, and what new rules I plan to put into place so that I can create my time to be rich, full and beautiful. And, plentiful.

It will not be a minor task; I have made a pretty big mess of my time and how I have pretended to manage it. However, it will be so worth it, when I can celebrate how much time I am given each day, rather than how much I feel deprived of.

Gotta go, out of time…. 🙂

The difficult situations are the biggest lessons.

Maybe this doesn’t seem surprising to some of you, but for me, once I realized that the most difficult situations in my life, have the biggest learning opportunities for me, I felt free.

For so long before that, I felt badly about bad things happening in my life, and bad things happening around me. I would even grieve it. I rarely saw that there could be a lesson in it for me that would be significant or meaningful. Especially, when the situation was occurring. I might even feel like a lesson came from the event much time after it occurred. However, I never saw the lesson at the very time it was coming to me.

I would cry, and wail, and wonder why I was, yet again, upset, left behind, unloved, or surprised. Why me?

Today, it feels so different than this. There are many mornings, when I am giving my daily dose of gratitude, that I express gratitude for the difficult situations. Openly, honestly and willingly. That seems so amazing. To want these lessons to come my way so that I can learn them, and grow and get stronger.

I have a good sized difficult situation going on in my life right now. At times, when I would not want to have to deal with the circumstances of it, and how I needed to deal with it, I would stay more in judgment and negativity toward other people. I felt so sorry for myself that I didn’t get strong and powerful in what I needed to do.

Today, I am powerfully saying what it is that I want and need. And, I don’t say it as a way to gain some sideways attention for myself, or to win favor. It is more pure than that now, and although it is not perfection, I am learning to love the lessons as they come, and to be open and humble as I learn them.

I want to learn, I want to grow, I want to be stronger and more open with each day. I want to love my life more and more and be engaged and powerful and loving. I see that all for myself now, not in sorrow from the situations that are present for me. Rather I see the opportunities in it, for me to walk into my life fully and confidently and live the life that I want to live.