So, my daughter, who is technically fourteen and a half years old now, is officially a high school Freshman. This fall, she will be walking the halls of our local high school as a student, not a visitor. It really has hit me that she is growing up, the time is passing quickly, and it has been an amazing ride.
Now, I have appreciated all phases of her life, and some have been more delicious than others. This picture is my favorite of her and I, because the total love that I have for her shows in my eyes. I am absolutely smitten. Still am. I am purely amazed and a bit scared, about how she has gone from this dependent little being, to the young woman that has to know how to be in the world.
Time. So funny, right? We have the same amount of time, each of us, in a day. Some of my days seem to go by slowly, others, speed away. The more engaged I am, the less I am aware of the fast of slow pace of the passing. I just enjoy it all more.
However, the passing of time, and the speed of it, that I DO notice more and more lately, is that of our daughter growing up, and becoming more her own person. Lovely, and scary at the same time.
No longer can I hold her and think that protects her enough from all there is in the world that can harm her. Now, I have to keep teaching her how to take care of herself. No more of taking care of her needs for her; it is the time of her taking things on for herself, and not needing me as much.
A part of me is relieved; relieved to know that our kid is a young woman who knows how to BE in this world. However, there is a nagging part of me that also wants her to always need me, to always depend on my taking care of her. I will miss that as the years go by.
For now, I will revel in the moments when she snuggles up to me after dinner, or wants to watch a movie together, or shows me how she has decorated her room for tenth time.
Time. I need to honor my time with her, because the growing up stops for no one.