I am a person that totally enjoys the holidays, and my favorite of them all is Christmas. I enjoy all parts of it: putting up and decorating the tree; shopping for and wrapping presents; Christmas shopping to find just the right gifts for those that I love; making cookies; and all sorts of Christmas songs and carols. It is like Christmas, in addition to its traditional, spiritual meaning, represents for a few short weeks, how I feel about the world, and my life, all year long.
I am also a person that likes tradition, to have a yearly ritual that feels like familiarity and comfort. And, this year, I found myself to have a bout of insecurity of what that would look like for me, as I am creating this new life and moving forward.
You see, for the last few years, for the lifetime of my daughter, my yearly Christmas tradition, on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, was spent with our own household celebration, and also spent with my former partner’s family. Don’t misunderstand me; I enjoyed those celebrations every year. Yet, there was a lacking of it being created with my own family.
In addition, when I went out on my own two years ago, there was also the nagging notion that I somehow didn’t have any of my own traditions; that since I was single for a long time since then, that I was without tradition, for me or my daughter, and that somehow, that meant that I was lacking in a way. That it was a situation that I couldn’t do anything about, for her or for me.
SO funny, and so not true!
I realized, through the wisdom of my beloved, that not having traditions in place simply means that I haven’t created them yet; and that, I can create a new tradition any time that I want to for myself, for my daughter, and for me to have with my partner.
In addition, I don’t have to compare what is a fifty year tradition with what I get to create. I don’t have to measure up, or be the same as, what anyone else has for themselves. And, I get to enhance for my daughter whatever she already has in place, with what we get to create together.
So, 2012 is the year of new traditions, that get to be built on my presence of the importance of this holiday to me. I get to make it whatever I want it to be, and whatever I don’t want either. So, what are the essential ingredients that I get to work with?
Cookies. Carols. Shopping. Wrapping. Presents. Stockings. Tree decorating. Snow. Cooking.
And, of course,