Under Construction.

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There are days and nights that I feel more evolved and see my progress than others. At times, I can look back at choices that I have made in the past, and see how far I have come with what I am choosing now, for example, my choice today to be sober. I clearly see how I came to that decision, where I was, and where I am now.

Then, other times, I lose sight of the progress I have made in an area of my life, I start to feel discouraged with how little I think I have accomplished or where I have come from. For example, when working to heal past relationships, and help them to go forward in a new way. I get frustrated at times with what seems to be a lack of progression, and want to give up and believe that it is hopeless.

Since I am learning every day (on the days that I consciously remember that!), and I am never the same person as I was the day before, that means that I am always progressing. I am under construction; a work in progress. I am not finished with the task of self knowing, or of knowing others, EVER. It is always changing, growing and building on what I have already learned. I always get the choice to take what it is that works for me, and leave the rest.

There are two key points about this that occurred to me this morning, both of which are essential to really grow from a deep, meaningful place. First, is the idea that we always need to hold ourselves, I always have to hold myself, accountable to make the changes and do the work. That means, I don’t have the right to blame others, point fingers or complain about what someone else did, or did not, do for me. I need to always be in the seat of taking full accountability for the life that I want to create for myself, and the self that it is that I want to build.

The second part, that is just as essential in my mind, is being patient and loving with myself through it all. I am, after all, a work in progress. I am a masterpiece that is in the process of being created, the final product which will not be known until I transition from this life to the next. In the meantime, I want to keep present to the need to look upon myself with eyes of love, and use those same eyes to view others as well. I am always changing, growing, evolving and expanding.

And, ultimately, the results will be pure bliss, joy and enlightenment.

shapebuddha

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