Earlier this week, we returned from a weekend trip to Florida, to visit my parents. We had fun, and sun, and many moments’ worth of love and warmth. And, I thought a lot about life, and living a life that I enjoy.
It got me further thinking about how so often in this life, we all at one time or another feel like we are a victim in this world. I have been the victim many times in life, at least in my own mind. Times in my life when I believed that I was powerless to the events and circumstances of my life, and that the world and all of its aspects were out to get me. Sounds paranoid, and dramatic?
That was me being the victim, plain and simple.
I thought a lot of my own history of being the victim, not being made the victim mind you. Making myself a victim in my life. I thought of all of the people in my life that I have known that have done the same at one time or another. As our plane was leaving the ground for Florida last weekend, I thought of the simplicity of my response to victim status:
If you don’t like the view from where you are sitting, change your seat.
This is not a flip, uncaring response. Think about it. In flight, if someone is afraid of flying, such as me, they may prefer to sit in an aisle seat; others prefer the window. Some of us enjoy sitting in a comfy, cozy chair, while others prefer the hard, stable seating at a kitchen table. Just like we have a choice in where we sit, we have a choice in our perspective about our lives and our circumstances.
When it comes to flying, and my fear of it, the plane, the air, and the elements around me are no more to blame for my fear of flying, than people or situations in my life are responsible for my unhappiness. If I am to build a happy, full life, then that is on me to do. Sure, there have been times when choosing happiness for myself seemed difficult, even impossible, in my own mind. Yet, it only ever takes a simple step, just one step at a time, to change what I am not happy with. To change my seat, my perspective.
It can seem easier at times for me to blame other people around me for not having what it is that I want in my world. I can even feel justified in blaming them. All of us can feel like a “worthy” victim once in a while, because of our childhood, our spouses, or some type of life circumstance that is, or was difficult.
Yet, that is nothing but a trap. The only way that we can ever be happy, and a warrior in our lives, is to take the steps toward the light, and to not blame others because we don’t want to move. Any steps that we do, or do not take, is all up to us.
Life is here, waiting for any one of us to jump in and take part. We just have to sit where we can enjoy the view.